Do dogs really grieve too?

When Clover joined our family, my then two year old Silky, who had been an only child since she was 10 months old, was a bit disgruntled. She had no problem voicing her concern with a lunge at the new puppy or becoming really protective of me. I asked everyone I knew if this would pass. Everyone assured me it would that they just needed to work it out and Bella needed to express that she was the Alpha Dog. About two weeks into having them both Clover had picked up a ball, went over to Bella and squeaked it into her face. There was a pause and I held my breath wondering how Bella would respond. The pause seemed like forever then suddenly Bella dropped into play stance and they started chasing each other. From that day on, Bella loved her sister like no other. In fact Bella, who loved every dog she ever met, went into protective mode while Clover adjusted and the dog I knew that never had an issue with any dog anywhere, suddenly hated all dogs. She would become protective and made sure no one messed with her sister. Even though I worked with Clover to help her become confident and not afraid, Bella never went back to liking other dogs. If she knew the dog before Clover she was fine, but that was it. Now that Clover is gone she is doing better with dogs again but she's no where near as playful. Who knows what will happen in the future. Right now, it's just one day at a time.

Clover and Bella were never separated. They never were out of their house. If I went away, the girls stayed in their home and someone came to watch them. We went to the park, the beach, walks, and over to friends houses together. They got groomed together, came to work with me and even at times I would schedule vet appointments together. The one day a year Bella stayed home and Clover and I went out was at the rescue reunion Cape Ann Animal Aid held with all the rescues they work with. Clover and I would go up to Stage Fort Park in Gloucester and spend a couple of hours reuniting with All Sato Rescue and visiting with everyone. It was only a couple of hours, but one year Bella was so upset we went without her, she peed on me and then on my bed. I made sure the following year she got extra loving when I got back. My girls never spent a day apart until Clover was hospitalized with her CHF.

I always knew when the day came, no matter which dog it was, the other one would be with me when we said goodbye. Over the years I've had people ask "Do you really think they know?" Or I've heard "When I got home my other pet spent days, sometimes weeks, looking for their buddy." Maybe that's why I always knew I wanted to make sure either dog was aware of what was happening. Either way, when I learned that Clover was much worse than the few days before, I asked the vet if I had time to go home and get my other dog to say good-bye. The vet said I did as Clover was in the oxygen tent and doing okay while in there. I rushed home and got Bella while my best friend called to tell me she was going to meet me at the hospital. I was so relieved to not have to go through this alone. When we were all there the three of us walked in to the hospital to say our good-byes to Clover. Now Bella is a Silky terrier. If you have ever had the honor of having a terrier for a pet, that sentence needs no further clarification. However if you're not familiar with the terrier breeds, they are tenacious, independent, stubborn, full of their own ideas, and non stop activity. Keeping a terrier quiet or still is almost an impossibility. That is unless they know what is happening and what they need to do. When we walked through the doors Bella, who ordinarily will pull with excitement and try to explore everything and everyone, calmly walked by my side and didn't bother to notice anything other than we were going into a room. Once in the room, my best friend picked Bella up and put her on her lap. Bella did not squirm, try to get down, try to get to me, she did not whine, cry, bark or make any sound. She was 100% calm and attentive to the room. Even when they brought my Clover in, Bella stayed still. She didn't try to get to Clover, nor did she try to get to the vet as she was administering medication. Bella sat quiet and still the entire time. My hand was on Clover's chest as I felt her heart start to slow and then stop. What a blessing and extraordinary pain to know my girl was no longer suffering. I looked at the vet and said "Her heart has stopped beating". As soon as I said that, Bella, who continued to remain very quiet and still let out one quiet whine/groan. She didn't move, it was just one sound. I looked at the vet and said "She knows, doesn't she?". The vet simply said "She knows". When Bella and I came home, Bella, who is a diva and usually sits on the couch with me, went under the couch and went to sleep. That's where Clover spent the last week of her life. Maybe she smelled her there, or maybe she felt closer to her there. Either way, that's where she went and stayed about a half hour after which she joined me on the couch again. She never once looked for Clover. She didn't have to , she knew.

If you think that's a fluke consider this. I told this story to a staff member of mine. Shortly thereafter she and her room mate, needed to put down their cat. Remembering my story, she told her room mate and they agreed their dog needed to see their cat to say good-bye. According to my staff the dog was a little restless at first, but once the doctor came in and administered the medication she sat perfectly still and once the cat passed, the dog let out one single whine/groan. She too knew. When my staff got home with her dog, her dog did not look for the cat. She knew.

My girl Bella was not herself for some time, but slowly she returned to her super mischievous self. I truly believe that if you have the opportunity afforded to you to be sure you let all your pets say good-bye and be present on their fur siblings journey over the Rainbow Bridge. Truthfully I think pets should always be allowed to say goodbye to their humans too. There are many documented cases of animals mourning the loss of their human. It's painful to see. 

 So, do dogs really grieve too? I suppose people need to decide for themselves but as for me I'm always going to tell you they absolutely do.